ABNA Expert Reviewer
What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?
I think the characters are the strongest aspects of this excerpt. Specifically the characters of Fatima and her mother. In Fatima you have an angry, young girl forced to marry for reasons she can not understand-but even at eight the author paints her with an intelligence, which I think is the author's way of giving us an idea of what is to come. Fatima's mother on the other hand, is a woman that is loved obsessively by her husband, and yet he has poisoned the mind's of the children-the product of that obsessive love. Prince Faraj is another interesting character. He knows that his forced marriage to an eight year old could very well bring about violence, and yet at the same time his youth is shown in his inability to have done the right thing. I think this is a very interesting set up.
What aspect needs the most work?
I think the direction was a tad unclear. If this is an historical romance, I can see this being very similar to something Johanna Lindsey or Jude Devereux might write. If that is the case, this book could have a very big following. The glitz, the glamour, the excessiveness are all in appealing in a romance novel. On the other hand, if this book has little to know romance in it, I am not sure who the book would be marketed for.
What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?
My opinion on this goes two ways: If this is a work of historical romance I am hooked. I want to know what happens next-and I want to see if Fatima and the Prince fall in love. Does Fatima grow up hating her father? Will she ever love her mother?
On the other hand, if this book is more of a history novel, I believe it can become very dry as it is a fiction story, rather than a history book.
ABNA Expert Reviewer
What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?
I love how clearly the author tells his/her story. There's a lot going on: political intrigue, kidnappings, marriages, complicated family relationships. And yet it's all presented with such skill and verve, in concise, beautifully shaped prose that's simple yet poetic. Much to the author's credit, I believe every word. I'm having a great time reading this.
What aspect needs the most work?
There are times when the writing takes on a slightly melodramatic quality, but given the exoticism of the piece and its heightened reality, this isn't the drawback it could have been. And the author has the skill to not let things get too exaggerated or artificial.
What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?
I loved this piece. The author writes with such authority about the
I was surprised not to see some others advancing, including one in particular who I was rooting for, but as I told her today it's ever onward and upward from here. I don't know anyone else among the other competitors.
So, what's next in the semifinal round of ABNA? Thanks to the help of two others who submitted to ABNA in the past, if I understood them correctly, Publishers Weekly will now read and score the
9 comments:
Congratulations again! You've got a special story here. :)
if this book has little to know romance in it, I am not sure who the book would be marketed for.
Ah, the old reliable "but what shelf will it go on?" *yawn*
Yup. So far, I've been pegged as a historical fiction, romance and fantasy (?) writer. I could proabably see the first two but maybe people think I write fantasy because 'truth is stranger than fiction' or some junk. If my books are ever "shelved", it'll be interesting to see where exactly.
I'm laying money on your fitting into the historical fiction section, given the strong sense of exotic time/place. The very appropriate (and lovely) cover you chose would also place it there.
Thanks Jeanne, I'd take whatever real shelf space they could give me
Congratulations on making the quarterfinals in such a large group of entrants. My fingers are crossed for even more good news upcoming!
Thanks, Richard
Wishing you the very best of luck! I can't wait to download my excerpt...*beetles off to get it*
Thanks Alison, keeping my fingers crossed for the semis, at least figuratively anyway.
Congrats to you! And I wish you luck in moving on to the next stage!
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