Sex in Novels: Your Thoughts

Yeah, I could have chosen a sexier title for today's post, but I'm putting all my creativity elsewhere right now. And not just into finding pictures like the one on the left!

In my last round of online reviews for On Falcon's Wings, I noticed several readers chiming in about the amount of sex in the novel. I have never really thought that I write truly detailed or even provocative sex scenes; they do nothing for me. One of my best writer buddies has always said she finds them tasteful. Is she lying to me? Fess up, writing bud; you know who you are. However, another writerly friend does love scenes that leave me needing a cigarette afterward. And I don't even smoke.

When there is a romance involved in the storytelling, I like to include lots of sexual tension, whether between the estranged lovers as in this book, or the couple in a pre-arranged marriage who will become passionate lovers, as in Sultana. My approach to including sex in any novel is never to be gratuitous or to write scenes according a specific formula, as in, "And they should have sex for the first time on page 163."

Also, while I write historical novels, some people assume that they are historical romance because of the interactions between my protagonists. Nothing against historical romance; I cut my proverbial reading teeth on the likes of Heather Graham, Johannna Lindsey, Betrice Small, but uh, I don't write historical romance. My characters always have rocky starts as in historical romance, but a happy ending is never certain. When my characters fall in love, I make them work for it. Sorry, but I do love to torture my creations. Makes the ending much more fulfilling or perhaps bittersweet, but more importantly, I want readers to feel all the difficulties have been worthwhile.

To me, detailing sex in a novel should be the natural outcome of the intense relationships that have been built in the preceding pages. Love scenes, like any other scene, should feel natural. It should make perfect sense that the characters would find themselves together in such a way. While I understand that some readers shy away from the details, if I've spent all that time building up the tension, showing the budding love as it evolves between two characters, should I really just close the door on the sex scene to follow? As a reader, I'd feel cheated of something if a writer did that me. But what do I know?

So, you tell me. Feel free to leave your comments, or if you don't want to go into detail, just take the poll below.     

Do you read detailed sex scenes in novels?

Writing Sex Scenes

One of the things I enjoy most about writing The Rule of Love is crafting the sex scenes. I promise, it's not because I'm a total pervert. It used to take me days of cringing and blushing before I could force myself to complete a pivotal love scene for my characters, but no longer. Writing this manuscript has been so important in helping me "get over it" and just get it done.
Sex can be one of the most intimate moments that people can share, but how do you convey a full sense of the experience? Especially, when the difficulty with sex scenes often lies in the descriptions of genitalia; more often than not, the scene becomes crude or comical, dependent on the terms you use. When I used to read historical romance, I often skipped the sex scenes because they were too explicit instead of sensual, or completely ridiculous. No more heaving or aching bosoms, please. And the idea that a very virginal heroine would be completely at ease exposing her naked self to a lover for the first time, know exactly where and how everything goes, and have a mind-blowing orgasm seems too far-fetched.

In writing Rule of Love, I focus most often on the emotions of the POV character and an exploration of the senses of the POV character, rather than who's doing what, in where, to whom. In the balance between physical acts and emotions, the latter usually wins out. And, there are at least ten of the twenty-three chapters I've written so far devoted entirely to sex. My first chapter opens with an orgy. No gratuitous scenes, because sex is not just sex in this manuscript. It also conveys a deep level of intimacy and love between characters. There's sex for the simple pleasure of it, and scenes that involve the domination and subordination of characters. It helps that my critique partners are both open-minded and they've provided wonderful feedback. I hope the audience I'm writing for will one day feel the same way.

As a reader or writer, how do you react to sex scenes?